First, know your limits. Is your pocketbook generous, your heart strong, your patience spectacular, and your knowledge of caviar replete? And how do you do with sharp beaks?
Accustomed to the clime of sandy coastal regions, the blue-footed booby flock to seaside resorts, summer regattas, and floating casinos. They respond well to praise, air kisses, and champagne toasts.
The blue-footed booby once had dreams of performing in the Russian ballet, web toes tripping lightly across the boards to such acclaim that swans would never be allowed near the lake again. Now they settle for summer stock and television hosting, with the occasional color commentary gig. You must support these endeavors with love, kindness, and multiple head-shots if you wish to keep your booby pleasantly inclined.
Traditionally of the B’Nai faith, younger blue-foots have become increasingly drawn toward Shamic Islam. This is merely for you own understanding of your booby; under no circumstances should you question a booby’s faith as they are apt to become stubborn and contrary.
When your booby throws its inevitable tantrums, let it sigh loudly and collapse against at least four pieces of furniture before trying to fetch your booby around with soft cooing noises and spa certificates.
The traditional attendant of sommeliers, blue-footed boobies make excellent companions to vineyard owners, bottlers, cork farmers, or anyone who enjoys drinking large quantities of wine. Should you form a rapport with your blue-foot you can expect years of witty conversations over crudités and soft embraces at sunset.
Popular names for blue-footed boobys include decapitated royalty, disgraced Olympians, and rock star widows.
Enjoy your new-found friend!
Accustomed to the clime of sandy coastal regions, the blue-footed booby flock to seaside resorts, summer regattas, and floating casinos. They respond well to praise, air kisses, and champagne toasts.
The blue-footed booby once had dreams of performing in the Russian ballet, web toes tripping lightly across the boards to such acclaim that swans would never be allowed near the lake again. Now they settle for summer stock and television hosting, with the occasional color commentary gig. You must support these endeavors with love, kindness, and multiple head-shots if you wish to keep your booby pleasantly inclined.
Traditionally of the B’Nai faith, younger blue-foots have become increasingly drawn toward Shamic Islam. This is merely for you own understanding of your booby; under no circumstances should you question a booby’s faith as they are apt to become stubborn and contrary.
When your booby throws its inevitable tantrums, let it sigh loudly and collapse against at least four pieces of furniture before trying to fetch your booby around with soft cooing noises and spa certificates.
The traditional attendant of sommeliers, blue-footed boobies make excellent companions to vineyard owners, bottlers, cork farmers, or anyone who enjoys drinking large quantities of wine. Should you form a rapport with your blue-foot you can expect years of witty conversations over crudités and soft embraces at sunset.
Popular names for blue-footed boobys include decapitated royalty, disgraced Olympians, and rock star widows.
Enjoy your new-found friend!
6 comments:
The Blue-Footed Booby Trade Association is in good hands with you at the marketing helm, and that is one handsome chick. I'd like to place an order for two, while I stockpile the Dom Perignon. I guess Thing 1 and Thing 2 just won't do at all, so make the certificates out to Milli Vanilli von Love and Tonya von Ono, if you please.
This was purest genius.
Thanks much! Louis the 14th Jones and I will keep an eye out for ya’ll at the next regatta.
Oh! Is he real!? LOL! He's absolutely beautiful - I think the color of his feet should be the color I paint my daughter's room.
Glad to have stumbled across your blog! I noticed that you've visited the Knox Writing Club, which is "my other blog" - so glad you've found us! Visit any time and, if you're interested in participating, just let me know!
Jennifer @ Random Ramblings
I know, any bird that photographs this well must have a good personality. I had quite a lot of fun searching Google images for just the right booby.
Yeah, I found Knox while linking around the other day. It reminds me of a similar venture my friends and I had called Last Saturday. I’m just browsing for now, but thanks for the invite.
:-d
Ah! This is subtle and funny stuff. Perhaps, you could take on the blue-behinded ape next. Best wishes. Count Sneaky
I came back and reread the "How to Care for a Blue-Footed Booby" It is so refreshing to find something like this! Count Sneaky
Post a Comment