Halloween

the dour-doored long haul of bureaucracy
blinking fluorescently in its complicity
to seep away all of last comma em
period first (please print clearly)
dusty little lively-hooded you
sliced into file folders with precision
naming of thee conventionalities
splaying you digitally, rigidly,
alone and cold in the dark oh my
winding and whining your way
through the twisties and roundabouts
of cemented impetuosity and
paved hesitancies clutching
and resisting among the poisonous
residue of possibilities worn
(pot-holed even)
and tiring, oh the weariness,
not nearly debating before the jangling
heraldry of the next ensnarement
of no just really this is just an innocent
piece of meat hanging, swaying,
its not really a problem
or a mortuary with a good sound system
nope no traps here and that scent
is not the imposing intimidation
of imminent intimacies with
iconoclastic ideologues a go go
(ay caramba)
it's just a holiday and you’re just
doing your best with what you’ve
been given skulls and bones and all
the eyeballs melting away
no, no, just kidding,
it’s fine

my sweet subconscious

this and then
black patent promises
sweetly made by my subconscious
quietly humming
that it’s just a careful study in patience
a shyly made line drawing
of which flooring material
I would choose, so carefully,
should you opt to floor me
this day or then
as I step carefully
in black patent promises
my subconscious assures me
are all the rage

Raven Country

Raven In the Pink
James Schoppert
Museum of the North
University of Alaska at Fairbanks

I was a little curious what it would feel like for me, as a raven storyteller, to go to the heart of raven country and the home of some of the most wonderful raven mythos. Would my little story seem inadequate? Off the mark? Silly? (Well, I was kind of going for silly in places…)

My reaction: comfortable. Two big black ravens sitting on the stones of a cold running creek, a pink lump of fish at one’s feet, the other spreading his wings. Yeah. Okay.

Call her Talks to Buzzards, catch you just past the next world.

Meesa back!

I’m back from Alaska! We had an amazing time and I highly recommend you visit that part of the world if you haven’t already. I have Alaskan-related posts planned in my head but, alas, am really tired from traveling (yeah) and going back to work (boo). Until I get to such posts, however, I thought I’d have this interim “Hey I’m Back but Tired Post.”

So, my friends, I give you the song that has been stuck in my head all day.

Travels

I’m off to adventures far and wide, my friends. Today I leave for a two-week cruise to Alaska with my Mom. There will be much taking of pictures.

In case you should miss your regular dose of somewhat obtuse raven mythos whilst I’m away, I give you “Kutkh and the Mice.” I found him in my raven researches and once more found a story that put my little notions to shame. Kutkh is a shape-shifting fellow who created the mountains and valleys when these mice…well, watch and enjoy for yourself.

Back soon!

Favorite Way to Waste Time on a Friday: TAG!

Lee posted another one on her page so I thought I’d take a break and play. I have a slight disclaimer though: I’m too indecisive and my tastes too varied to ever have a true favorite anything. This list is just a few of the things that first came to mind.

FAVORITE

Sport: Baseball. There is something intrinsically pleasing about sitting in a park, drinking a beer, eating a hot dog, and shouting at a bunch of husky men in tight clothing as they play on a beautiful sunny day. God bless Americana.

Yatzee Color: I don’t Yatzee. No particular reason, I just have never been introduced to the game. In Trivial Pursuit, though, I’m partial to the brown pie.

Movie: Hellboy. (For those of you familiar with my Star Wars addiction, see the above disclaimer.) Guillermo del Toro is a visual effects god, or at least a crazy artistry wizard. The richness of his movies is astounding. Hellboy is a comic book movie, no doubt, but Guillermo and the dedication of the actors makes it so much more. I love the characters, the blurry lines of good and evil, the humor, the pathos, and the way Guillermo serves it up. Few things are as beautiful as the image of the demon standing in the rain with his dead father’s crucifix wrapped around his wrist. Hellboy waves his hand in front of his face, “I can’t change this,” and you have to love him. And the sequel was so completely satisfying.

Broadway Play I've Seen: Spamalot! Pure joyous laughter.

Song: “Your Mouth Into Mine” by Black Francis. The song is his dedication to Herman Brood and it’s the song I would write and dedicate to him if I could do such things. “I got into your heart—it was no big deal.”

Favorite U.S. City Visited: I crazy fell in love with Chicago. I was ready to move when my friend suggested I visit her in the winter.

Favorite Foreign City Visited: I was blown away by Florence. Florence was the Italy I was looking for when I was disappointed by Rome. Rome is a big, dirty, metropolitan city. It is still a fantastic place, but I had romantic suppositions for it that it did not fulfill. I had no expectations for Florence, and there was the dreamy Italy I was looking for.

Book: The Hundred Secret Senses by Amy Tan. (Again, see disclaimer.) This is one of those books that just grabbed hold of me. Its subject matter is so exotic yet so relatable. From cover to cover it had me entranced. It’s a lovely treat of a novel.

Children’s Book: Alexander and the Magic Mouse by Martha Sanders and illustrated by Phillip Fix. Oh, how I loved that alligator. The image of him practicing smiling extra wide so people would like him is indelibly etched in my mind. The illustrations are magical.

Classic TV Show: "A-Team." “I love it when a plan comes together.”

Recent TV Show: "Eureka." Funny and smart sci-fi. Not to mention a hunky leading man.

Actor: Richard Dean Anderson. MacGyver and Col. O’Neil—you can’t beat that!

Actress: Milla Jovovich. Kick ass, take names, rock those skin-tight futuristic costumes!

Perfume: I don’t wear perfume. I do sometimes use Bath and Body Works scented fig and brown sugar lotion.

Food: Rare ribeye with a side of garlic mashed potatoes, and sautéed mushrooms.

Dessert: My Mom’s homemade German chocolate cake.

Chain Restaurant: P.F. Chang’s

Local Restaurant: Bourbon Street. I’ve never had a bad meal there and I dream of their shrimp.

Car: I lust in my heart after James Bond’s most recent Aston Martin.

Condiment: Spicy mustard

Kitchen Appliance: Coffee maker, but of course.

Home Appliance: Washing machine. It’s been several years since I’ve had to carry to my laundry to a laundromat/community laundry room, and I’m still very happy about that.

Beauty Product: Chrome nail polish. It’s soooooo bitchin’.

Favorite Clothing: My long-sleeve Trinity University oversized shirt. Worn to perfect softness, it comforts me like an old friend.

HGTV Show: Design Star, I guess. Not so much with the HGTV.

Food Network show: Ace of Cakes. I love watching creative people being happy as they do something well. I’m sure Mary Alice and I would be best friends if we were to ever meet.

Author: Jasper Fforde is the latest to make that list. Hysterically clever.

Male Songwriter: Frank Black (a.k.a. Black Francis) “It’s like jelly roll, like sculpture.”

Holiday: Christmas. Food, family, peace on earth.

Christmas Ballet: I agree with Lee. Is there another one besides Nutcracker?

Disney Character: Lilo of Lilo and Stitch. I rarely identify so completely with a cartoon character.

Alcoholic Drink: Silo has an espresso martini that is crazy wonderful.

Non Alcoholic Drink: Grande soy vanilla latte

Magazine: Real Simple

Animated Movie: Wallace and Grommit: Curse of the Ware-Rabbit

Mini Series: Tin Man. A very fun retelling of The Wizard of Oz. I recommend it to the Netflixers.

Season: Crab

Male Vocalist: Paul Simon “Maybe it was a third world, maybe it was his first time around…”
(He and Frank were in a death match for songwriter, so I felt he should win something.)

Female Vocalist: Sheryl Crow “…come outside and join the human race, but I don’t feel so human.”

Musical Group: Artic Monkeys “There’s only new music so there’s new ring tones”

Day of Week: Tuesday

Household Chore: Seriously? Who likes household chores? Cleaning the mirrors, I guess.

Ice Cream: Brindle’s Azteca

Candy: Gummi Bears

Artist: Dale Chihouly

Quotation: “You need a million things, a million things will come to you.”—Yogi Bahjan
I’ve been repeating that one a lot recently.

Wordzzle Tag

I’m a little slow on the response to this challenge from Chrysalis Dreams. In summation, produce a paragraph using the following words.

spaghetti, larkspur, Prilosec, roaring lion, adamant, green green grass of home, paradox, filibuster, face cream, trout fishing

I cheated a tad and produced a small scene, but it’s mostly dialog so it reads quickly.
+++

Lisa stares at the television above the restaurant’s bar. Even on mute she can tell the C-SPANned senator has worked himself up into quite the filibuster. His crinkled red face and large hand gestures indicate an adamant patriotic call to action if ever there was one.

“Hey, do you need anything from the store?” Bill says as he scans the menu.

She doesn’t respond. She’s too busy wondering why chain restaurants bother to have TVs. They’re mounted too high up to see properly. Even if they weren’t permanently left on mute they would be difficult to hear over the various restaurant noises.

“Hey. You. Store. Anything?” Bill tries again.

And why C-SPAN? Is the bartender a poly sci major? Surely they can’t think that the clientele of a family-friendly chain restaurant is just so caught up on C-SPAN that they might not eat out unless it’s featured above their heads as they chow down on greasy fries.

“Did I tell you my father called?” Bill says to the side of Lisa’s head. “He was kidnapped by aliens while trout fishing.”

Lisa doesn’t register the words but she can tell there’s a tone in Bill’s voice. Her busy thoughts reluctantly drag themselves away from the ongoing restaurant TV paradox. She looks at him.

“I’m sorry, what did you say?”

“I’m going to stop by the store on the way home tonight, do you need anything?” Bill says with exaggerated enunciation.

She smiles sardonically.

“Well, I need—oh no, never mind,” she says.

“What?”

“I need face cream, but I’ll just get it myself.”

“I can get if for you.”

“You’ll get the wrong kind,” she says gently.

He rolls his eyes.

“You get the wrong fabric softener once…” he sighs.

“I said unscented and you got Spring Valley. I can’t use Spring Valley because it makes me itch,” she says. “Why do they have to put scents in everything? I don’t even know what a spring valley is supposed to smell like!”

“Like cooing birds, new larkspur, and the green green grass of home, I imagine,” Bill says philosophically.

“Hmph,” Lisa replies.

The waitress appears and asks them for their order.

“Cob salad,” Lisa answers.

“The chicken parmigiana sandwich,” Bill says.

“That comes with a side of spaghetti or fettuccine,” the waitress says.

“Spaghetti.”

Lisa gives him a look.

“I skipped breakfast,” he says, “and my stomach is a roaring lion. From the green green spring valley.”

Lisa smiles while rolling her eyes.

“I hope the lion remembered his Prilosec,” she sighs.